Well i am having the worst last couple of days my motivation is shot and my attitude stinks!!!! I hate this when this happens and it always around that time of the month!!!
I hate being around Ryan at the moment he is driving me nuts and all i can think about is food and what i cannot eat!!! How stupid! i have been doing so well!!! I have not binged but there have been some close calls for example last night at midnight i was looking at the loaf of white bread and butter and honey and i could have eaten the lot!!! But i did not it took all my strength to not have it, but i have been dicking around with my food though, a little extra protein here, 2 chicken crimpes of chloes there and an extra few walnuts here and on Friday night i had masterfoods bbq sauce on my omlette for tea and lots of it, just silly things like this that will not help me and my goals!! Any suggestions for a bbq sauce substitute?
Anyway i think also Ryan and i have not been getting on so great due to the fact that we are tired from Chloe not sleeping and our life styles are so busy!!! He starts work at 6.30am and does not get home till after 6pm he is an accountant so busy time of year and i just seem to run aroound in circles!! Between that and his footy coaching which i might add is only going to get buissier due to his commets coaching starting up in october he has to travel to rocky 2 times a week and they play in weekends and sometimes train on weekends and all this with planning a wedding which i might add he has not been very helpful at all!!! It just frustrates me so much!!! I aske dhim today to look at honey moons and no interest, jsut said well have you got a plan as to how you will look at honey moons, now i just thought get ont he internet!!! Anyway i just feel as though i need time away from him!! DO not get me wrong i LOVE him to bits but it just gets all too much at times!!! He also said my training gets in the way of us sometimes!! I saw RED when he said this as i try not to do anything when he is around, i get up early in the morn when he is getting ready for work to do my cardio and i do my weights when chloe has a sleep and he is at work and sometimes that works out to be when he is on lunch but i always have his lunch made etc. and sometimes on days when i work i may have to do something when Chloe goes to bed but normally he is at footy training!!! Can you see a problem!! Also this traininging makes me feel so good when the motivation is good but even when its not once i have done it i feel great!!
Anyway i have really had a whinge today sorry everyone for that just had to get it off my chest!!! I just wish i had people close to me with similar fitness goals etc and understanding but i have no one!! Just feeling a little down and out and i do not want to loose control as it will not help me and how i am feeling!!
Sorry to be so negative next post will be better!!
Chelle
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